My Idol Top 3 Predictions 2014

 

Last night I made my decision for top 3

 

3^rd Place-

Alex Preston. He’s quirky and talented and has switched it up but I do think he isn’t as quirky and talented as the judges would like us to believe and I think if Harry Connick Jr. was able to go totally uncensored on this show he would say the same, but I doubt Idol would let that happen. Alex isn’t different. We have a bunch of these Jason Mraz types out there and taking a popular song and adding a reggae tone is hardly creative genius. He looks terrified to be on stage half the time and uncomfortable in his own skin. However, he’s consistent. He puts on a good performance each week and has gone under the radar through most of the competition.

 

2^nd Place-

Jena Irene- Truly the “dark horse” and I hate to be so cliché but it’s absolutely true. She rose from the obscurity of the crop to the top.  Every week she gets better and better. There isn’t really anyone out there right now with that voice. She does have some Paramore influence in there but she isn’t out there week after week taking every song and making it into a Hayley Williams song.  Last nights version of Carrie Underwood’s, “So Small” sold it for me. She’s an artist. She has the voice to sing a song like Barracuda in her range without trying to be Ann Wilson and she took a sweet and vanilla country song and made it into a version that could easily be re-released today and hit the top ten. She is amazing and honestly could take the whole thing if not for……

 

#1- Caleb Johnson

I wasn’t particularly impressed with Caleb in the early shows before they got to Hollywood, but Idol does that. They keep the good ones hidden. They don’t give all their goodies up at once, so he went on with a steady but unimpressive run for a bit. Once he hit the stage solo and had control over what he sang and the arrangements, it got real.  Caleb can sing anything and make it sound like he is the first guy to ever perform it.  His version of Rival Sons “Pressure and Time” sold it for me. Not because I'm a huge Sons fan but because he didn’t go out there and do a karaoke version. He did it Caleb style.

The reason he will win over Jena Irene really isn’t about vocal ability because they are evenly matched as we saw in their Gimme Shelter duet. The reason he will win is because HE IS A FRONT MAN. He has it all. A vocal range that today’s artists drool over. Since day one I have wanted him to sing a Chris Cornell song and I am still holding out hope for it. Caleb isn’t your standard “pretty boy” front man. To me he could be the love child of Jack Black and Meatloaf. That’s not to put him down by any means, I am just saying he isn’t the traditional rock and roll guy we are used to in today’s market.  It really doesn’t matter cuz when he sings its all sex and rock n roll and you believe every line he sings. He will be the next Idol and he will have a very successful rock n roll career as long as Idol doesn’t water him down. That’s why second place in this competition is usually better. They don’t force a formula on you, but Caleb is strong and I suspect that he will do his time as the Idol poster boy and then go out and do what he does best and that is ROCK.

 

Honorable Mention-

I had to take a second to talk about Jess Meuse because I have been screaming at my tv, and on twitter since the day she sang Crow and the Butterfly by Shinedown. Jess has NO idea how strong her voice is and the range she has. She isn’t comfortable in front of an audience and just needs someone to PUSH her. Her song choices week after week have been nice and safe and kept her sort of under the radar never falling in the bottom three. It kills me because there were a few moments in the Crow and Butterfly tune that I heard what she COULD be and I am confused as to why she doesn’t hear it. I remember the first time I belted out a note. I was like “damn that felt good” I haven’t looked back. So my hope is that someone out there in Hollywoodland sees what I see and scoops her up, and makes her into the giant superstar I truly believe she can be. She has the look, she has the talent, she just doesn’t have a clue.

 

2013 a Year in Review

2013 was once again a year of change. I guess I am realizing as I get older that change is part of life and although at the time it is occurring you may be resistant to it, ultimately it does all happen that way that it was meant to be or maybe you just acclimate to it. Either way life goes on and you must move along with it. There isn’t any sense in trying to live in the past when everyone around you is looking ahead. You will get left behind with nothing but memories and loneliness. LIVING life is continually pressing on and making new memories. It doesn’t mean you let the old ones fade they just become part of your collection.

 

The difference for me personally this year was that although I did suffer loss either through death or the demise of friendships, it wasn’t the theme of my 2013.  So many good things happen in 2013 that outweighed the negative. 

 

My son Brandon is a senior in high school, he got his driver’s license, he has applied to college, he is writing sports blogs and playing basketball and has an amazing group of people he calls friends who are good kids and all are driven to do well. As a mom, it’s a relief to know that your child is in a good place in his life and on the path to a bright future.  He celebrated New Years with his best friends and I couldn’t help but wish I was a fly on the wall just to see him enjoying the life that I, his father and grandparents have all had a part in.

 

After 7 years with Elim Park and being pretty stifled in the position for the last 2 I finally decided to actively pursue a new career.  I put my resume out and applied for 5 positions in one week. Three of them called me back immediately. One I decided right off wasn’t for, the second I thought was pretty interesting but the third was the one I was really after. I was so happy when I received the offer and less than excited when they asked me to come in at a little below my current pay rate but with travel cut in half and the prospect of a bright future I was willing to do it and said yes. Then, literally a few days before I was to leave my job and start anew, Connecticut Innovations called. They were the “second” job I applied for.  I really thought the job was interesting but when they called I had already accepted another job. They weren’t giving up and presented me with a life changing piece of paper. I couldn’t say no to the salary, the benefits and all the perks that come with it. So I started in November. It’s been a bit slow to start with some technology things slowing it down but all in all I like the job, I love the benefits and I believe that this is the start of a great career for me.

 

There was some loss. Another gone to soon due to a motorcycle accident. He was an amazing father and husband and it shines through in everything his wife and children do. I am in awe of them every time I see them at how they are coping with losing the man in their life at such a young age. It really shows you how true love can overcome even when the physical bond is broken.  RIP Paul. 

We said goodbye to Andrew who put a never ending fight with cancer and wasn’t going down easy. He lived and loved and his family was there with him in his final moments. I didn’t know Andrew well but I know his brother and it was touching to see how that family just rallied around their brother, their son, their uncle to make sure he was never alone and was able to stay in the home he loved so much til the end. Keith now possesses the “man cave” which meant a lot to Andrew and I know that it means as much to Keith as did him.   

ROCK ON RON.  Ron K. was someone I knew way back in the days of my illustrious career at Edwards Food Warehouse when I was a kid. He was always a great guy with a dark sense of humor and a love for music, a passion for music and the boy could shred. When Facebook came to be we reconnected and would chat quite a bit because he was always “lurking” at odd hours of the day and night and I would be on his same schedule it seemed. Ron battled with the loss of his leg due to an infection and would have taken any average person out of the game for good didn’t stop Ron. He fought and fought hard and came back. He even got to play again with his band it seemed like things were really looking up. When he started not feeling so great he played it off with many of us just saying it was some complications but he would be back at it. Sadly, he had aggressive cancer that came on hard and fast and took his life.  I don’t know why he won the fight of one illness only to be taken by another, but I don’t dwell on it. He lived, loved and impacted us all and he will never be forgot especially when we see a sexy red head which was his weakness.

 

Eddie oh Eddie. A smile and laugh that could light up a room. Such a gentleman. Always looking for love and giving all he had to his children. Eddie was just a good guy to know and be around.  When I heard of his passing and that is was complications due to a surgery that was supposed to improve his quality of life I was struck by the irony. I will never understand why someone is taken so soon for what seems like a senseless reason but we must move forward and remember.

 

Loss of a friendship or a friendship that transforms into something different than what it once was is hard but I have learned to accept it. I have been down this road before and I am optimistic that in time everyone finds their place in your life and it is what is best for everyone. I will never forget the good times, the talks, the tears, the laughs and all that she has done for me. It’s what keeps the door open to the future that although it can never be what it was it can certainly be something new and healthy for us both.

 

Love was definitely in the air in 2013 and I couldn’t be happier for all those that found new loves or reconnected with old ones. There were weddings galore and I was happy to attend many of them.

 

40 . I turned 40 this year. I had a wonderful party to celebrate the milestone with the ones I love and it was a great day and will stay with me for years to come. Being 40 has been a little weird because I have had some physical ailments just seemingly pop up out of nowhere, but I do believe my 40 year old mind appreciates more, loves more and is more understanding than that of my 25 year old former self.

 

So that was 2013 for me. Filled with lots of fun, tears but most of all memories. I wish you and yours many memories to fill your heads and sweeten your dreams in 2014. Never wait to tell someone you love them, don’t put off something you truly want til the right time because that time will never come.  We go around once or at least we only remember it once so LIVE, LAUGH, LOVE.

 

♥

Things that run through my mind:

Life is Short- It has become glaringly apparent over the past few years. Maybe it's because prior to 2008 I had not had to deal with a lot  of death, but that has changed. Since 2008 I have lost 9 family members or friends. That seems a bit extreme considering that's within  a 5 year time period. I'm getting older, I realize it comes with age, but sometimes I feel like screaming "Really?"

Time Flies- I stood in a beautiful field watching my talented cousin take the most amazing photos of my son, the high school senior and I couldn't help but remember the photo shoot at Art Rich in 1997 to commemorate his one year birthday. Yeah, that was a long time ago and I feel like it was yesterday, but in the words of my idol, Stevie Nicks:, "Children Get Older and I'm Getting Older Too."

Love is strong- The power of love has guided me back to friends I thought were lost and has inspired me watching the strength of people facing difficult decisions but the love guides them and gives them the strength to do the unthinkable.

Communication is key- Talk to them. Someone I admire greatly pointed out the pitfalls of the digital age of texting, emailing and facebook. Although its a great tool it has replaced a lot of human contact and has caused problems because of miscommunication. There are things not meant for social networking and should be handled in person or a phone call. I won't forget that in the future. You never know the struggles of others unless you ask.

Animals are great and people can suck- I love what I do with Bikers Against Animal Cruelty. It makes a difference every day for an animal and that's what is important, but I would be lying if I said it doesn't affect me.  A piece of me dies every time we lose an animal to abuse. Some days I just want to crawl in a hole and hide from the world. So much evil and pain inflicted on animals who just want to give unconditional love and be loved back. It shouldn't be this hard, but it is. People suck sometimes. It's a fact of life. So until every animal is treated with love and respect and has a place to call home. We shall continue to fight.

Times are tough for everyone- I struggle all the time with finances. I am a paycheck to paycheck person. I'm grateful for my ex, his parents and my mom because without them my son would not have the things he does. I feel so worthless sometimes because I can't do for him and for others in the way that I would like. I hate receiving the little red warning bills every month. I am embarrassed when at times I'm raiding the change jar for gas money. Am I alone? Hell no. Are there people out there in far worse shape than me? Absolutely and I remind myself how lucky I am that I have the support of family to give my son everything he deserves and that I have a roof over my head and food for my animals. It's tough. Every day is a struggle, but we keep on going, we keep on giving when we can. We do the best for ourselves and others.

This is what is going on in my head today. If one thing I have shared today helps you gain perspective than putting myself out there is worth every word.  

Love to all.

The New Leaf

Be Honest

   To your parents

   To your children

   To your friends

   Most importantly to yourself.

Own your mistakes. Forgiveness comes quicker that way.

Learn from them too.

Take the blame no matter how big or how small. If it's yours to take.

Remember the good times, when the bad is smacking you in the face.

Respect the person if you can't respect the decisions they make.

Let go if you must. Hold on if you can.

Forgive in your heart even if you can't say the words.

Make peace with what you can't change.

Listen to the opinions of others but never forget its their opinion.

Stand by your choices rather than defend your actions.

These are the things I have realized. These are things I have learned and will follow them to the letter.

I'm turning over a new leaf because the old one is just too dirty.

It's a Blog Kind of Day

... Those were the words sent to me by someone I love dearly and who is a friend and mentor to me.  Maybe she's right. It is good for the soul.

 Let's see what to write? There's been so much that has happened. I could easily use this vehicle as a way to express "my side of things", but then I would be doing the very thing I have been avoiding all along, picking sides.

I guess all I can say is that throughout the past year, I did what I thought was best in the interest of everyone and that includes me. Yes. I most certainly made decisions that would be best for me that may not have made others comfortable or happy with those choices, but I can't live every moment for others. It's not done out of malice, or personal gain. It's what is in my heart.  

I didn't choose one person over another.  Nor did I choose a group over another either. I tried to keep a healthy balance , but when your loyalty is constantly being tested and scrutinized rather than accepted it makes it hard to maintain a friendship. When it is no longer fun and neither side is happy then why stay together?  It doesn't make sense. People change for a whole host of reasons. I accept that, but I expect the same acceptance when I tell you that the person you have become is not a person I would have ever had a relationship with to begin with.

As I write this blog I am realizing how cryptic I am trying to make it in order to not air our dirty laundry. Most will know who and what I am talking about so it seems stupid to try and talk in riddles. We both know what is fact and what is fiction. Neither of us is any picnic to deal with. Strong personalities, emotions run high. etc, etc. What I'm not sure is clear is the bottom line as to why I walked away. It has nothing to do with choosing to be friends with the perceived "enemy". It had everything to do with your actions and I'm not going to go any deeper than that here, because as I was continuing to write I realized that my emotions and frustration were getting the best of me and what I really want to say isn't meant for my blog readers but for you individually and sadly, you don't want to hear it.

Lastly, if I'm being brutally honest, the loss of our friendship is sad, but the loss of a few others who never even bothered to talk to me about what was going on and indiscriminately just took sides bothers me more. I never gave any reason for anyone to assume I am anything but genuine. My actions have been honest and deliberate and without malice. Taking her word and only her word pretty much tells me that you never thought much of me to begin with so I guess in hindsight it's good that your gone. I would have been open to a discussion so you could see where I'm coming from, but I guess this was very convenient for you. It was a quick way out.

I was reminded by the person who told me to write this today that I have wonderful supportive friends and that's what matters. I have a great family, and wonderful partner in life. I will always be disappointed at how people chose to handle this situation, but I will not apologize for doing what I felt was right. Everyone has a story that deserves to be heard. Everyone deserves respect.  This was never about me choosing. It was about life going on and people changing and how we all handle it. You made your choice. I made mine. 

The End.

I wrote a blog today

I wrote a blog today, but I can't share it.
It is personal.
It is the truth as I see it.
It would not be well received. Those in denial rarely accept the truth.

I wrote a blog today but this time it's just for me.

What's Goin on?

 

The past week was an emotional roller coaster for so many. Boston was terrorized, Texas suffered a horrific accident and in China was literally shaken.  These were the headlines across the nation and the world in the past week. It makes a person wonder "What's Goin on?"

The bombing in Boston is a sad horrible senseless act done by some sick and demented individuals. I don't pretend to know their motives or their affiliations if any. I stick to the simple facts at hand. Two men murdered 4 innocent people and maimed and injured upwards of 200 people all in the name of their religious beliefs.  I don't want to write a big long blog about the act itself. My purpose here today is to share what I keep telling myself each and every day to get through. I read this tweet by a young Muslim girl.

Makes sense to me. I sure as hell wouldn't want the entire Christian community to be judged based on the actions of the crazies in the Westboro Baptist Church.

What the world is going through today is scary. It makes me want to give up on humanity. I want to home school my son and never let him leave the house. I think about every major sporting event and wonder is this going to be the next attack? Then I take a deep breath and remember that the actions of a few do not define the lives of billions.  Yes, there are bad people in this world but they are outweighed by the good. The generosity of those around the world who have performed selfless acts of kindness in Newtown, Boston, and Texas.  I read a link today on buzzfeed that showed 44 amazing acts of kindness throughout the world to help the victims or to at the very least show solidarity in this great country that we live in.

http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjs538/images-that-perfectly-capture-the-american-spirit

We can not let the actions of bad people define our entire life. We can not let fear dictate our actions. We can not let the bad guys win. We are a nation of superheros.  When the Westboro Baptist Church tried to picket military funerals, off duty military personnel, bikers and citizens create walls to prevent them from disturbing the mourners.  That's a superhero.  When the children of Newtown were under fire by a madmen, the staff didn't run they protected their children and some died for it.  They are superheros. Millions of people donated to funds and other projects to help these families move forward from this tragedy. Yup, superheros.  When Boston became a warzone, runners ran to the hospital to give blood, spectators ran TO the victims to help. There images abound of people helping people. In Texas, volunteers from all over were making their way to the wreckage to help with the recovery. Children setting up lemonade stands to raise money. This is what we are about. This is what we should remember. We are not a nation falling apart. We are a nation standing strong against those who would do us harm.

This might sound hokey. I'm not naive. I know this world is in the crapper in many ways, but we can't give up. We can't give in. There is a whole lot of evil in this world and it gets covered 24 hours a day on television and can be accessed whenever you want. I think we tend to focus on the negatives and take for granted all that is good.  

Be kind, be generous, don't rush to judge or place blame before you have the facts. Stand up for what you believe in but think before you speak. It is the little things that make a difference in this world. It only takes the small deeds of the masses to impact the world. 

I hope we never see another tragedy like 9/11, Newtown, Boston, Texas and all those that came before, but if we do we will overcome.

We are strong!